One of my best friends just left for her semester abroad, and several others have been roaming about the globe since the New Year. So, maybe I should have posted this earlier, but better late than never. So, here is a list of 11 things I wish someone had told me before I left:
1. Jet lag is real and it sucks. It takes my body about a week to adjust, and it seems, for me at least, that jet lag gets worse before it gets better. I was walking around in a fog, exhausted no matter how much I slept, had headaches, and could not concentrate properly. All you can really do is try to sleep on a normal schedule and wait for your body to adjust.
2. Culture shock is very, very real, and is a phenomenon studied in organizational psychology. It can lead to fatigue as a result of the strain from the effort required to make adaptations, a sense of loss or deprivation, feelings of rejection or isolation, confusion, anxiety, and indignation at being forced to adapt. There’s a whole chapter dedicated to it in my textbook, but basically, it goes back to our innate need to control and understand situations, and when that is taken away, we react very negatively. When we had this lecture, I found it quite comforting because it meant that I was not a failure for feeling some of these things. It is OK to feel frustrated, lonely, confused, and tempted to get on the next plane home. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO FEEL BAD. Once I acknowledged that this was what I was feeling and why, I was much more able to handle it, and things greatly improved (if only this lecture had not come at the end of last term!).
3. Trust your instincts. If your gut is telling you that the directions the nasty French lady gave you were wrong, don’t keep doing what she says or you may find yourself in a very sketchy area far away from where you were meant to be. If something seems to be telling you the way you are going is not safe, find a different way. Even if you wind up walking much more than you intended, or even splurging on a taxi, your safety is what comes first.
4. “If you never have, you should. These things are fun and fun is good!”- Dr. Seuss
Try things you never thought you would try. Do something different. Even if you hate it, at least you can say you tried it.
5. Work hard, play hard, but balance them, and plan for each. I set a goal for myself to get all of my papers and work for the end of last term a week early, so that meant I had the last week of the term to just enjoy Christmas time in London without anything hanging over my head. It was fantastic!
6. If you’re cooking for yourself, cook way more food than you think you’ll eat in one sitting, and save the rest. It’s so nice to know there are yummy things to reheat if you have a paper to work on later in the week.
7. You don’t have to forget that you’re an American. Bake cookies even if the concept is foreign to your non-American friends. Watch The Biggest Loser and Glee online if only to be able to talk to your American friends about them. Refuse to use Google.co.uk and stay loyal to Google.com. This helped me to feel connected to home, and established a stronger sense of normalcy for me.
8. Speak up! I had a lecturer who was using an example of “prefects” to explain a concept. I could tell a lot of the other Americans in the room and I had no idea what a “prefect” was but we were all a bit embarrassed. Finally someone spoke up, the professor laughed, explained, and from then on was careful to always explain uniquely British terms he used.
9. Walk. Besides allowing me to lose some weight (yay!) , it can actually mean getting somewhere faster or with less hassle than you would on public transportation, and it has allowed me to see some really cool parts of London I never would have seen otherwise. A great site is www.walkit.com (it tells you the fastest route, estimated time for slow/average/fast walkers, calories burned, and how much CO2 you’re avoiding)
10. Don’t be afraid to do things by yourself. I’m still working on this one, but often not having “someone to go with” has held me back from seeing a museum or checking out a market. It can be a really great experience to do things on your own.
11. Call, email, and gchat with family and friends A LOT. Yes, it’s great to make new friends, but homesickness can make you miserable, and it doesn't make you weak to want your mommy when you're sick, or wish your Dad was there when things seem to be falling apart. I have actually gotten much closer to some friends from back home than I was before I left, and I have come to appreciate my family so much more. Maybe distance does make the heart grow fonder, or maybe I’m just clingy, but I am so grateful for how much my relationships have benefited from my being here. I love my family and friends more than I can say, and I don’t know how I would have made it through last term without them.
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Allowed to feel bad? I distinctly remember anyone and everyone telling me that that was not allowed! I think I might even have a few incriminating text messages to that effect!
ReplyDeleteI was deceived!